Because This is My 1st Confession

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I have been watching korean drama "Because this is my first life" for the past three weeks. The story mainly talk about how a contract-based married couple who didn't have a feeling for each other at the beginning but both of them slowly  grew an affectionate as the day passed. When i watched it i started to ask myself, what is it like to be in love with someone? I started to look back at the day when was i really having some interest in guy? I mean I've never been in relationship or having a closed-friends guy. Do I even have such a feeling/ have i ever fallen in love with someone? I kept remind the day when i was younger, and no matter how i tried, i could remember that i didn't have one. 

I started to feel uneasy. If I could recall it, I don't have such a love story in my young age but I've ever gotten a love letter though, I got two. It was around my school age, one in the elementary and else in High School. It's a vivid memory for me, although both of them was completely out of my expectation but still, it's really matter. I could call my self as a selfish person in this case since I'm kinda a cold type of person. I've never replied them properly. I didn't react at all. I even returned the second letter to a friend of the sender, telling him to take it to the sender without saying anything and acted like nothing happened whenever I bumped into him (The Sender). 
Ya, I never realized that i was wrong until now, I knew I could tell that i was completely lost my mind back then, some people might scolded me for what I've done in the past. I never care what the person who write it feels like, I never know how hard was it to him to write such a letter, I didn't appreciate all his efforts. To be honest I never told about this to anyone else, never even once. I do have a lot of friends back then but I'm not a type of talkative person who share everything and openly saying what happened with my life and how i felt that moment. I realized that I was IGNORANT PERSON, and that's what makes me feel BAD about myself. I thought i am a good person but I am NOT. I think it's really too late to apologize to them who might have hurt because of me, NO, because of the immature side of me.
So here I am,
"I'm officially apologize to whom I might hurt in the past. I can not say this in person, since i didn't get in touch with them ever since. I sincerely apologize from the bottom of my heart for the wrongdoings I've done, I didn't mean it, I was just immature."



My Workspace
November 11th 2017

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